Graduation can be a scary time in the life of a young person. The tassel is flipped like an executioner’s switch, and you find yourself at the crossroads of your future. To help traverse the many rocky paths that lie ahead, FEARnet has commissioned alumni from our very own Poisoned Ivy League University to come up with some helpful adVICE for the graduating student BODIES of 2008...

Dr. Hannibal Lecter: Make time to enjoy friends and colleagues for dinner.
Jame ‘Buffalo Bill’ Gumb: Dress for success but remember, beauty is only skin deep.

Michael Myers: Always take care of family first.

Jack Torrance: All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy…

Marlow: Maintain an active nightlife as a way to relieve stress. Get out and paint the town red.

Jigsaw: When it comes to problem solving, be careful not to fall into the trap of self-reliance… Sometimes the key to your puzzle rests in someone else.

The Horseman: Keep your head, even when all around you are losing theirs.

Norman Bates: No matter how old you are, mother always knows best.

Jason Voorhees: Enjoy the great outdoors. Go camping.

Leatherface: Make sure mealtime with the family is special time with the family.

Freddy Krueger: Be the master of your dreams…a real dream warrior.

Annie Wilkes: Most great achievements can be measured by the amount of misery endured.